February 14, Twenty-Twenty
Dear Sometimes Y,
Wish you were here! You would love the giddy weather and yokel ambiance.
Sometimes it’s steamy hot. Sometimes it’s chilly, wintry even, like in the Yukon. Sometimes it’s dry, but sometimes it will rain enough to flood the Yucatan crater, a real gollywhomper.
Sometimes I lay on the sunny, sandy beach to get a tan, but I have to be careful not to burn like a yule log or I’d yowl loud enough to be heard in Wyoming.
Sometimes at night I sit under the stars and admire the syzygy. Starry nights are special here. They make me feel young again, almost girly.
Sometimes I dine out. Sometimes I eat in. Sometimes I drink a ruby red cabernet and sometimes I drink a pale yellow chardonnay. It depends on the meal. Breakfast in. Dinner out. Red with beef. White with fish. Turkey with yams.
Have you heard from Yvonne? The last that I heard, she was on a yacht off the coast of Sydney with Mary, Roy and Bryan. It’s been almost a year since I heard anything from her, or from her sister, Yolanda, for that matter. You? She’s a real mystery!
I did hear from Kay. She called to tell me about that yahoo boyfriend of hers, Myles. She complained that he always yells at her about every little thing. She yammered on and on. Yawn! Sometimes she just drives me crazy!
While I’m here I hope to find a nice young man to marry. But, not someone from New York. Maybe a Connecticut Yankee. Perhaps a lawyer. Someone with gray eyes. Someone with whom I share a synergy, so we can start a dynasty.
Sometimes at dusk I go for a bicycle ride on the trail by the arroyo. Don’t ask me why, but sometimes at that time of day, I find bicycling very relaxing. I yield to a need to unwind. You may think that’s odd since I used to practice yoga to relax. But, that was so yesterday.
Anyway my dear, it’s time for my afternoon beauty nap. I’ll write again sometime.
Sayonara Love,
Aeiou
Author’s Note: Sometimes Y is a vowel. Sometimes Y is a consonant. Y is bi. Can you tell when they is them in this letter? It’s not as easy as it may seem.
Y yes! A yeoman’s job!
Thank ewe.